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I've figured out my problem!
I'm still unable to correctly trust some, and even myself at times.
Though I'm immensely good at building myself up and all the jazz, I still seem to dampen my moods with one thing: my lack of trust.
I don't trust my decisions and the decisions of others.
And I don't trust what people tell me, at all...
I saw something on the internet -kill me- that reminded me of someone, and I thought to myself, "Hmm.. didn't he/she tell me that they would never ever do that again, but yet this might be them?"
I hate hate HATE liars and bashers, like.. to no extent.
But I keep on lying to myself all the time, telling myself that I'm perfectly fine.
gahgahgah.
I wanna go back 9 months. To when I trusted everyone and everyone trusted me and could depend on me.
I doooo care, and I always have, no matter what.